Holla..

Hollaaaa....

very.. very long time no see lah (singlish mode on)... since 2 years ago.. since i finally get married.. since i finally become mom.. and from i really love my job.. until i consider to resign from my job... *sigh....*

Ok.. where do i begin... (*thinking...*).... i know.. the hottest issues in my life now are "my job"... "fairness" and "award"...

Job.. fairness and award.. can you find the connection? lately.. i feel that i have to leave my current job now.. honestly.. i do really love my job.. i love being legal consultant... enrich my knowledge... make me smarter smarter and smarter... train me to face the difficult condition and how to settle it.. etc etc.. (some benefits that i get...) but... but... but.. actually i wonder.. why everything cant be run smoothly? why there is always "But.. but and but...,. " ;-(...

i get the fact.. that the place that i dedicated for... has treated me so unfair... yes so unfair... feeling so sad.. indeed... feeling so stupid.. yes so stupid..

Backward flow : i got married.. i already had a cute baby girl... and i can't perform midnight show just like i did previously.. and i have my own office.. (but still i dedicated my self to this place... )

So.. whats wrong with that?? supposedly... there's nothing wrong with that.. but.. seems.. they think.. that someday i will leave this place and will take care my own office (which this point is so natural) and they think they don't necessary to maintain me.. in fact.. i already warrants them that i will leave for the next 1-1,5 years.. but still..
some people get the increasing of salary twice in a year.. but not me.. my junior now has same salary as me.. and it is very extraordinary situation.. i swear i know it..

new employee obtain higher salary than me.. but still i have to recheck their task.. and still i have to transfer my knowledge to them...

then i ask to my self.. then i wonder to my self... AM i STUPID? or AM I TOO KIND?
where is the fairness.. where is the appreciation? hello.. for the recent years.. i have already dedicated my self.. my ability in here.. try to be loyal.. try to be patient...

i have already make this place richer... i have already spent almost my day in here.. overtime without overtime pay (moral obligations only..) even when i was pregnant..

feeling so tired.. and i very wonder.. and i still here.. when i write this blog..
i have already submitted my resignation.. but they (he) told me that i have to reconsider again...

God.. now i know.. the true meaning of Take For Granted...